Ever wonder how all those boxes and parts for your partners/hubbies Jeep sneak their way into your house or garage? The first rule for most hubbies regarding the purchase of Jeep additions is to NOT let the spouse know anything. And before you all jump on me for that statement, yes there are some Jeep guys that share the thrills with their spouses.
There are special rules regarding part purchases and most husbands think their wives do not know or suspect anything. "If my wife knew how much I have spent on adding extras to this Jeep, she would kill me!" I have heard that statement many times when out with the guys. Hmmmm…..please give us some credit!
When parts have to be ordered from the store, the salesman knows to not call the house when the parts are ready to be picked up. They know that if the spouse gets the message and she gets upset then hubby is really in trouble. After all you WANT customers to keep on purchasing items, and hubby will want to keep on buying stuff even if it means sneaking it on the Jeep. Parts may be delivered to work, or to a friend’s house, or even be picked up and left in the back of the car. When asked about those parts, when did you buy those parts? "Oh no, those are old, don’t worry dear, they have been sitting on the shelf in the garage for awhile." Or "I am just holding them for a friend; he will be picking them up." Yeah right! And the best one, "Oh, Joe bought a newer version and gave me the old one for mine." Or "Hey, I am trying them out to see how it works." So how do those parts later appear on his Jeep? Every time you go shopping together, you inevitably end up in the car part section or the Jeep dealer, and you hear "Just looking dear, don’t worry!"
To be fair to the guys, there is a lot of pressure to go higher, bigger tires, lower gears, soft top, and hard top. Getting a winch is very important, and of course if you have a winch, well then you just HAVE to have a welder on board. After all dear, I can fix anything on the trail if I have one of those! It seems the more radical the Jeep the higher up the Hierarchy they are. Higher, bigger tires, better shocks, air compressor, welder, winch, special axels, bullet proof bumper, side bars, lights and so the list goes on and on. Add up the costs and you will be shocked! Mind you there are some wonderful hubbies out there who have no problem buying the wife something in exchange. One of our old friends would negotiate with his wife before buying anything or making radical changes to his vehicle. She would get a dining set, bedroom set or something else in exchange and so both were very happy.
So here is my story:
"I don’t suppose too many wives come home from work to find hubby has decided to go down to the Jeep dealer. 'Why do we need another Jeep, we already have a perfectly good Grand Cherokee with extras already added to it?' We had had fun in the Grand Cherokee out on the trails. I enjoyed driving especially with air-conditioning, a stereo, mug holders and windows that wind up. I could put that Cherokee any place the other guys could put there Jeep. Well he says, 'I thought you might enjoy having your own Jeep.' (Huh, when did I say I wanted a Jeep of my own?) Or, 'This was on special and I have already signed the paperwork, I can’t return it now.' So on Easter Day the new Jeep arrives in the drive, and he says 'Look what the Easter bunny bought me!!'
As if this wasn’t bad enough, two days later I came home from work to find the Jeep completely disassembled (thinking to myself why would he disassemble a new Jeep?) Both axles in the front yard, the Jeep was perched high on jack stands and piles of boxes that the UPS man magically leaves on our doorstep. (I think my husband is more excited to see the UPS truck than me.) Over the next week I do get to find out what is in those boxes, and the neighbors go from shock to admiration and then jealousy as the Jeep changes before their eyes. Lift kit, shocks, transfer case parts, lockers, axles, rims & tires, bumpers, skid plates. All of this for a brand new Jeep which doesn’t even have 25 miles on it As the Jeep comes closer to being a running vehicle again he proudly exclaims how he has already planned that the Jeeps first trip will be to the Rubicon Trail. Sighing, I resigned myself to this just being the beginning and I guessed rightly that the UPS man and I would get to know each other really well as over the next few years, parts just kept magically appearing."
I am sure from listening to the guy’s talk that this is happening at many other Jeep homes. The UPS man once asked what all the packages contained, and I pointed at hubbies Jeep parked in the driveway, and he became excited and delighted, wanting to know more details. The Jeep drew a lot of attention, and we frequently had neighbors hanging around wanting to see more and to talk Jeeps. You meet the nicest people when driving a Jeep and there are always other people willing to go and explore new trails and places. Our garage became "the" place to work on Jeeps, and so hubby had a new excuse that the parts being delivered were for someone else. Or that he had sold his tires to the guy up the road and he needed new bigger tires now. He of course needed more tools to work on the Jeeps. But he also gave other guys a safe place to leave parts they had bought and could not take home, or to work on their Jeeps and add extras without the spouse getting too upset at the sight of their Jeep in pieces again. Sold, traded, begged or borrowed, it didn’t matter; unwittingly I was now part of the conspiracy.
Ironically, I had not realized that his signature line on JeepBoard.com was
"I swear dear I do Love you more than the Jeep!!"
That should say it all.
Chris "BossDawg" Kranzler
